Sample Chapter: The Cats of Laughing Thunder in The Scottish Invasion
Posted on October 05 2018
Fritz’s Weather Blog:
Weather Report for Josheka Farm, Laughing Thunder County on Friday, September 8: clear with a high of 99 degrees Fahrenheit, 5% chance of precipitation, morning humidity of 90%
“Students,” said Ms. Robo Kitty. “I’ve asked Wee Fiona to give us a short lesson in Scottish swordplay today. For safety, we will use foam pieces shaped like swords.”
“Thank ye, Maistress,” said Wee Fiona as she walked to the front of the classroom.
“We shall start with the solo drills,” Wee Fiona said.
“By the Great Cat, this is old-fashioned stuff!” said Pumpkin. “Why don’t you have me teach everybody something new and exciting like pumpkitsu, a blend of tae kwon do with tail spikes? ”
“Ach, what a useless thingy that is,” said Wee Fiona.
“It is not!” Pumpkin said. “We used pumpkitsu to fight off Nasty Gray.”
“And what pray tell is Nasty Gray, some sort of foot fungus?” said Wee Fiona.
“Students, enough!” Ms. Robo Kitty said. “We are here to learn more about Scotland. We will let our exchange cat teach us about Scottish swordplay.”
“Solo drills teach the fundamental skills of swordplay,” said Wee Fiona. “These include balance, biomechanics, footwork, cutting, and thrusting.”
Pumpkin rolled his eyes.
“Pumpkin, will ye please come to the front?” said Wee Fiona.
“Do I have to?” said Pumpkin.
“Yes,” Ms. Robo Kitty said.
Pumpkin dragged himself slowly to the front.
“Grasp the sword in two paws, and cut the air with it,” said Wee Fiona.
“It’s a piece of foam!” said Pumpkin. “I hardly think that’s going to cause terror in any enemy.”
“Pumpkin,” said the teacher.
Pumpkin grasped the piece of foam in his front paws, and slashed down hard through the air at the wastebasket.
The wastebasket shot up and hit Pumpkin in the face.
“Ouch!” yelped Pumpkin. He grabbed his head with his forepaws and hopped about on his hind paws.
Wee Fiona clutched her stomach and laughed. The other cats laughed as well.
“Students, that is enough for today!” said Ms. Robo Kitty. “Return to your seats for math class.”